Blog Post #1

I related to Roxanne Gay on a personal level, but from a different perspective. My senior year of high school I was the captain of the varsity football team and a regional all-star with numerous scholarship offers from small schools to play football. It was almost like I was royalty. My walk from class to class in my Alma Mater was filled with handshakes, smiles, and congratulations from faculty and staff. As a matter of fact, on one occasion after the end of a historic undefeated regular season, the principal called some of my teammates and I into her conference room and thanked us for our efforts and dedication to the football program. It felt like I was one of the Wakefield twins that Gay referenced in her article. Despite the glory and popularity my athleticism gained me, it was not what I longed for. You must understand that during my early childhood years I was nerdy, different, and most of all tormented. During those years I found solace with, “the nerds”. In middle school, I was a part of the choir, played video games, and had about two or three reliable friends. However, due to a rather large growth spurt and pressure from my middle school gym coach, I tried out for the football team. Quickly after that I realized I had a talent for this sport, and continued to hone my craft throughout high school. My excellence on the field gave me a pass into the popular crowd and countless friends. Be that as it may, I began to feel out of place in my honors and dual enrollment classes. I would often catch other students with confused looks on their face when I would walk through the door on the first day of school. It was as if I no longer belonged in these classes. I quickly began to realize that students viewed me as nothing more than a dumb jock, but on the inside, I was still the same eleven year old chubby kid that loved Harry Potter. Feeling rejected by the people I once felt most comfortable with was disheartening. I often found myself alone, and without a true sense of belonging. Nevertheless, I knew who I was. I refused to conform to what everyone wanted me to be, and instead I chose to be myself.